lolita
Wednesday, July 16th, 2008Hello Lolita,
Just had some thoughts i wanted to share with you Sweetheart. We have had some interestingly tough times with communications lately…hehehe. We are of different worlds you & i………and we are both very brave for fighting through this. This is expected. I have not been completely honest with you this last week or so. I have not been feeling well, but did not want to worry you. Its nothing serious……just mental exhaustion. We are both dealing with so much in our lives right now.
I have to come to an understanding about somethings….one, is that no matter how much i love you, and no matter how much i care for you, and want to protect you from pain and saddness………i now realize that thier are just somethings you and i must go through ourselves. I will suffer greatly while you are in the hospital….by not being able to see & be with you, this, i cannot help but to feel…..i am in love with you. And i also know that you also will be suffering greatly while in the hospital, not with just your physical pain….but also the pain of not being able to see me & have me there with you…..after all, you are in love with me.
All i can tell you Lolita, is that i love you, ” un-conditionally”……its that simple….
i can tell you that i care for you….its that simple….
that i will worry about you….its that simple….
that i will be here for you at all times…..its that simple
that i will NEVER leave you….its that simple
that you will never have a lonely night….its that simple
that i will be with you forever….its that simple
that i will never hurt you….its that simple
that i will never dissapoint you…..its that simple
that you all be my only lover….its that simple
that you will ALWAYS be my best friend…its that simple
that i will always protect you….its that simple
that i will always trust you….its that simple
that you can always trust me….its that simple
that you will always come first….its that simple
that i will always love your family…its that simple
that i will never lie to you….its that simple
that i will always share with you…its that simple
that i will always pray for you….its that simple
that i will always pray with you….its that simple
that i will always decide with you….its that simple
that i will be with you in 70 days…its that simple
that i will spend my first night with you….its that simple
that i will always be gentle towards you…its that simple
that i will always “make love” to you….its that simple
that i WILL MARRY YOU….its   that simple                  Â
and that i will always be proud of you….its that simple
and that i will ALWAYS Honor you….its that simple
and that i will always respect you….its that simple
that i will teach you of many pleasures….its that simple
and Lou, I will ALWAYS be your HERO……its that simple
………What is not simple, is to not not be with you….it is not simple to miss you
Everything is going to be just fine Lolita, My Lady. Your surgury will become part of the past, and the lonely-ness we now feel will never be in the future. We must trust in our love that we both feel for each other, and trust God in his wisdom in bringing us together so we could test this love. WE cannot let each other down, and we sure cannot let God down. These 70 days will soon be like the 70 days that have allready passed…..they will be gone, and we will meet at the airport in Manila, or we will meet at Linns’ home….and our new life will begain………Lolita…???…
You will always be my Beautiful Lady, i will wait to hear from you at all times….and i will trust in God that you will not be sad, and that you know that i will always be here for you, and that i will always be yours. I am very sorry for our lack of communications we have experianced. This is not anyones fault…..no one is to blame ……we are just 2 people who are Madley in love with each other, and want to be with each other more that anything in the world. We are both lonely for each other, and we are both a little scared…………
……………..and we both Love each other, it’s really very Simple. You will be in my every thought of every moment Lolita….and i will visit you often in my Dreams. And when you get out of the Hospital…..i will be right here, i will NEVER leave you..
your Billy
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